The second season of Here Come the Newlyweds is premiering tonight, and if you knew there was a first season, cheers to you. The winners from that first season took home nearly $500,000, and a new crew of newlyweds are here to try their luck. The screwball adventure finds couples - trying to identify their spouses by butt squeeze alone, competing in paintball competitions, and much more, all on the road to learning about themselves and each other. Each week the couples vote one of their own of the show.
(ABC/ADAM LARKEY) ANDREA SMITH, MATT SMITH
The first episode is all about introducing the couples, and the first chance to add money to the pot is a Newlywed Game style round of questions where the couples hope to give the same answer as their spouse. If you know The Newlywed Game, you know what sort of fun that can lead to. What you might not expect is the rampant babble about how frequently the couples have sex.
Moving on in our introductions, sort of, we let the couples loose with paintball guns and throw caution to the wind. Thrown in the mix of oddball challenges, the couples chime in with their thoughts on marriage, fighting, and a variety of topics so that you can get to know their perspective on things. It's fabulously enlightening. Some don't get through their cutscene without fighting about their views on fighting.
(ABC/ADAM LARKEY) WIVES
No reality show would be complete without a little eavesdropping, so we get a few scenes of the couples mingling over drinks, and then it's off to the hopelessly staged shots of the couples going over their reactions in bed. The next morning finds our couples involved in a challenge to get dressed in the dark, and general hilarity ensues... maybe.
A couple goes home at the end of this first episode (there are eight total episodes), and we're off to the races. It's hard to get any sort of feel for this show that doesn't seem to have a particular focus. While a few of the challenges seem to have a little to do with marriage and/or general "newlywedness," most of them just seem like random bits of goofy. It's the kind of show that leaves you trying to decide if there is anyone you can love to hate enough to bother watching.
For some, this show will be a guilty pleasure treasure, but for most of the rest of us, it might be hard to find a point. If we had some compatibility-determining theory behind things we might have something, but apart from watching fairly silly people be silly at each other, the audience is largely set adrift.
Meet the Couples -
Marlo & Mark Corliss - After dating off and on in college, both went their separate ways, only to once again cross paths and fall in love. Hometown: Yarmouth Port, Massachusetts.
Ashley & Matt Cox - This outdoors-loving couple have known each other since the fifth grade, when they met on the school bus. They know everything about each other, which can sometimes lead to knowing what buttons to push and harmless bickering. Hometown: Smyrna, Tennessee.
Sarin & Jed Hinkins - Virgins when they got married, this couple's honeymoon was the very first time they were together. Their honeymoon hotel turned out to be a "clothing optional" resort - which was incredibly awkward for them. Hometown: Cedar City, Utah.
Brendan & Bridget Huffman - In high school, Brendan and Bridget ran with the same crowd. Years later, Brendan bumped into Bridget at a rock concert -- she was on a date with another guy. Sparks flew, Bridget ditched her date and the two have been together ever since. Hometown: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
Michele & Sonarak Ieng - Sonarak met Michele at a date auction where he was the emcee and she was up for auction. He bid on her and the next day Michele contacted him. The outgoing couple have been together ever since. Hometown: Fairfax, Virginia.
Makayla & Kenny McMorris - This fun-loving and goal-oriented couple met at their church, but started dating after seeing each other at a club. When it comes to examples of happily married couples, they say that they are each other's best role models. Hometown: Omaha, Nebraska.
Audra & Rich Newbery - It was love at first sight for Rich when he saw Audra dancing at a club with her friends. Audra says that it was Rich's British accent that won her over. Hometown: San Francisco, California.
Katie & Nick Oskowski - This couple is addicted to fitness. She teaches aerobics and he is a personal trainer. If that weren't enough, they enjoy spending time together working out at the gym. Hometown: Mentor, Ohio.
Andrea & Matt Smith - Although Andrea and Matt fell in love at first sight, it was five months before they shared their first kiss, and they dated for two years before getting married. Hometown: Cottonwood Heights, Utah.
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About Marc Eastman
Marc Eastman is the owner and operator of Are You Screening? and has been writing film reviews for over a decade, and several branches of the internet's film review world have seen his name. His reviews have brought him personal praise from the director of a major motion picture, and have been used as required reading in a course at a major University. These priceless rewards, along with just bags of cash, keep him from straying from freelance writing. He is also a member of The Broadcast Film Critics Association and The Broadcast Television Journalists Association.
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